ELLEN KENNEDY

I'm Embarrassed Because I Own an Ipod

severe depression makes me recklessly steal things

the day you left me at the corner

i went to price chopper and stole a bunch of bananas by walking to the bananas

picking them up and walking out in front of 20 people or so

i ate 2 bananas

and cried

then threw up on the side of the road in a field

i felt like i was in a movie

the feeling was terrible

like my brain had transformed into a taxicab

that really isn't a taxicab but a white rusted station wagon with 'taxi' written on the fake wood side paneling in permanent marker.

Green Toothbrush

the train leaves in 50 minutes 

two people having sex to a lonely and frustrated person singing 'i'll probably never see your face again' 

two people taking turns standing under the water in a shower 

the hair is black and smells like lemons 

two people using one green toothbrush 

the train leaves in 20 minutes 

one person standing, ironing a red dress 

the train is leaving in 15 minutes 

the slip is too long and sticking out of the red dress 

the boots are loud and slow 

two people on a train taking turns laying down on one person's lap 

the hair looks more brown than red when short 

yelling 'soccer' in secaucus station

waiting for the new york train 

the new york train arrives in 3 minutes 

two people buying two large organic coffees 

caffeine making four eyes bigger and two brains faster 

one person feeding a lemon to one pigeon 

one pigeon walking away uninterested 

two people sitting on a subway train with two coffees floating above 

two people lying very close on a one person mattress








learning to pee standing up

i turned on the shower faucet and the walked over to you standing in front of the toilet 

i took my clothes off and put my hand under the water in the shower to see if it was hot enough 

i wrapped my hands around your waist and put my chin on your shoulder and watched you pee 

you peed for at least 35 seconds, i was impressed 

i tried to impress you by showing you i could pee standing up 

i once knew a girl from the internet who googled directions on how to pee standing up 

i wasn't impressed 

i pee, on average, for about 5 seconds 

i always remember to put the seat back down  

i don't know why i thought this poem would be a good idea 

i'm embarrassed

My Dog is a Little Obese

put the clif bar in your pocket from a florida gas station and walk away 

put the entire box of clif bars a duane reade in penn station in your

bag and walk away

put two clif bars from price chopper into your pocket and walk away 

this is CVS, there are no clif bars here 

buy 4 clif bars from albertson's and feel bad 

there is 50mg of caffeine in your clif bar 

cut the clif bar in half with scissors and eat one half and put the

other half in a bowl 

hide the scissors in the closet 

there isn't any caffeine in the lemon poppyseed clif bar 

put organic green tea extract on your tongue and put your tongue in my mouth 

there is 50mg of caffeine in my brain

Ellen Kennedy lives in Pennsylvania. Her work has been featured or is forthcoming in elimae, juked, 3 am magazine, and Luna Negra. Her e-book, yesterday i was talking to myself and i told myself that i was going to write a book and give it to you, so i put paper in my bag and put a pen in my bag and rode my bike to the river bank and then sat down and thought, 'i will never write a book' and watched ducks swim away from me, is available at bearparade.com. She also writes and does illustrations with Tao Lin for their press, ass hi books at www.blueberryhamster.com

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